disclaimer:

Written while on a 14 hour flight from hong kong to chicago. united sucks. wtf is economy plus? ill tell you what it is – its the same shit economy seating with a little fabric flap that says economy plus. its one unedible meal per 10 hours and dirty looks when you ask for a second “glass” of “wine.” It is faulty in flight entertainment and overhead movies that have funny lines cutting across the screen. A few hours ago I was in a club on top of the marina bay sands drinking champagne without a care in the world and now i find myself hungover, packed into an outdated 777, waiting for the drink cart to bring me a glass of lukewarm boxed wine. what? 

  
So my last day of work was supposed to be 8/21, but i jumped ship a few days early and hopped on a flight to singapore. contrary to popular belief, i did not go to singapore to experience the fantastic airport or vast array of delicious food options. i did not go to singapore to gamble at the marina bay sands or take a selfie with the merlion. i did not go to singapore to drink copious amounts of champagne and eat late night chinese, and i definitely did not go to singapore to retrace anthony bourdain’s footsteps or stay up all night watching john oliver youtube clips.

  
All of those things happened, yes, but those events were not what made me leave work early and fly across the world two weeks before i move across the world.
I am very fortunate to have a few people in my life who, upon merely seeing their face, give me that “everything is going to be fine” feeling. over the past few years i have experienced a homesick feeling quite consistently. that longing and empty feeling is not for a place; it is for a person. there’s a line in an avett brothers song that says “i have been homesick for you since we met,” he was talking about his child but you get the point. I think that sense of homesickness has been heightened in the recent weeks, likely due to all of the changes in my life and a general feeling of uneasiness i’ve been experiencing. i will be honest and say that i have not been 100% sure of any decision i’ve made in months,except for the one to get on a flight to singapore. 

  
so, i did not go to singapore to sniffle through my first bowl of pho or to follow up a yoga class with a box of cupcakes. i did not go to singapore to experience their brilliantly efficient subway system or to walk the streets of chinatown in absolute awe of its cleanliness. I definitely did not go to singapore to go to a louis vuitton island (yes, island) or to share champagne with new acquaintances, while feeling literally and figuratively like i was on top of the fucking world.

  
i went to singapore for one particular embrace. i went to singapore to ease the homesick feeling that has been haunting me for months now. i went to singapore to throw my arms around one particular person and finally feel home. i went to singapore to fall asleep with a smile on my face and wake up feeling like i was exactly where i should be. it had just been too long.
so yea, i flew across the world for a hug. shut up. lucky for you readers (all 4 of you) my trip to singapore was pretty fucking awesome and i have a lot more than a hug to write about. stay tuned.
   

 

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